Self-love - that was one of the coaching conversations.
Self-love is for women and children. A man must work hard and provide for the family, without expecting much in return. If he is lucky, he will get some peace at home. That’s okay, that’s life. No man that I knew, ever talked about self-love. - that was my perception when I got into the coaching conversation.
We challenged the strong beliefs, assumptions, and expectations that I had about self-love. The important question that was left unanswered,
How do I love myself?
The first idea that popped out was to do the things you love to do. Ride that motorcycle, trek those mountain ranges, jump from the plane, or dive deep into the ocean. Whatever makes you happy, and motivated and keeps that adrenaline pumping. Life is an adventure. You get to live once.
Do something you love.
Interesting.
Doing something I love, is self-love.
Doing nothing is ???
Doing everything that I should, whether I love it or not is ???
Doing Nothing —> Doing Something —> Doing Everything
What’s the minimum most that I can do, that can be considered self-love?
Breathing. Just breathing to stay alive.
There is nothing else you can do if you aren’t alive. So, that’s the minimum form of self-love?
Hmm.. Okay, fine. If doing is not your thing, how about?
Be yourself and be with yourself
What does that mean?
Spend time with yourself. Do you read books?. Go to a coffee shop or sit under the tree shade, and spend the evening with a book. Do you love mountains?. Go, sit quietly on the mountain top, and listen to the birds, wind, and the distant traffic. Do you love music?. Listen to your favorite songs. Just be with yourself.
That’s interesting too.
But, why would I need so many external things, like a coffee shop, tree shade, a book, mountains, birds, music, etc?
What happens when I remove all the external stimuli?
Can I be with myself in a dark room, void of sound and smell?
Just be with nothing and be nothing in a void.
Does that count as self-love? At least the minimum form of self-love?
The conversation had to end, but the thought of self-love prevailed this time.
I tend to think in this direction.
The simplest form of self-love is to be nothing and do nothing
This idea implies that everyone alive, already loves themselves.
If you already love yourself, everything else you do, to love yourself, feels like a compensating act for a lack of something in your life. What’s missing?. Only you would know.
Also, Is it a coincidence that all saints in ancient India isolated themselves, renounced everything, almost naked, and stayed in a deep meditative state for many years or decades to reach enlightenment?.
All they do is - Be Nothing and Do Nothing.
Ironically, the simplest form of self-love is the hardest thing to do. I don’t know what enlightenment means and I have not met any enlightened person so far. I don’t know what’s at the end of the tunnel. But, I like walking in the tunnel.
If you don’t understand a word that I wrote, no problem. If you do, reach out to me. We have NOTHING to do :)
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